Overcoming adversities by becoming comfortable with our problems
Posted by admin on August 18, 2009
One of the reasons that we may not be overcoming our adversities is because we have got comfortable with our problems. Is that really possible? Absolutely! I remember my mom refusing to take a natural supplement that truly made her feel better, because she said, “then nobody would know that I was sick”. That can sound almost too ridiculous to believe, but I know that at some of my deepest and darkest moments, I used all sorts of excuses to get out of moving ahead.
Now you may not be that extreme but are you comfortable with the idea of “life after a resolution”? Are you ready for “life that now moves ahead” instead of being stuck? Those can be uncomfortable questions but they´re good ones.
For example, you may have an adversity of a difficult relationship. So you complain to your friends about your challenging partner or marriage mate. You think about life without the negativity this person brings into your life. And there it stops.
I remember saying to one of my clients once, “what would your life look like if you stopped complaining?” After her gasp of astonishment, she said almost sheepishly, “it would look quite different”.
I highly recommend that you look at your list of things you feel you need to overcome, aren´t perfect in your life or you would like to change. Then honestly, and that is the key word here, honestly look at how willing you are to give up the story, the drama, and the victimhood around that issue.
If you say good-bye to the unhappy relationship, would it become apparent that you were part of the problem? If you quit the job you hate, would it be obvious that you really need to brush up on your job skills? If you fired the clients you complain about, would you attract better ones?
Overcoming adversities in life is a choice. It is a choice we all make every single day. Remember…every adversity can be overcome. We simply need to choose to do so.
Jan Janzen is a non-denominational minister, healer and business coach. She is the author of two books and 8 CDs for the spiritual entrepreneur. To receive Jan´s complimentary ebook: 10 Secrets to Living the Life of Your Dreams, www.janjanzendaily.com
Enjoy more writings from Jan in the Overcoming Adversity with Grace FREE eBook.
http://overcomersinc.com/grace
Thank you for this article, Jan. The hardest part of personal growth is always an honest assessment of ourselves. Allowing truth is misinterpreted as us being failures when in fact it is the boldest acknowledgment we can make because it opens up the many options to implement lasting change.
Hi Jan,
This is an extremely important topic you have addressed. It’s shocking to think that we often want to hang on to our problems rather than solve them, but unfortunately it’s one of those very peculiar things about being human! Recently I took a course called the Heart of Money in which we explored many things, including this very issue. Sometimes when a businessperson starts to get more business thereby increasing his/her income, he or she will experience MORE stress than was present when living with too little income! It’s as if we are not sure that we deserve this abundance, and are unfamiliar and uncomfortable with this new -found affluence. The teacher of the course talked about how people in this situation will stop answering emails or phone calls, miss deadlines or appointments or other unconscious strategies to move back to the former known state of “not enough money”. The antidote to this situation, according to Mark Silver, is to intentionally take some time to integrate this change, this increased income. Allow this abundance to enter into your heart, and let it be there in a calm and meditative state. Then when you feel that your heart has accepted this increase, take time to be grateful. Allow the gratitude to REALLY sink in. Then make any external adjustments needed to integrate this increase into your daily work life by adjusting your priorities, timeframes, deadlines etc. Do this every time there is an increase in your financial well-being so that you do not unconsciously sabotage or reject it. We’re so interesting!!
Margaret
Add A Comment